


Mad Teacher

by kunpimoose



Category: GOT7
Genre: AU, M/M, Romance, school!au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-11
Updated: 2016-05-03
Packaged: 2018-05-26 01:46:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6218738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kunpimoose/pseuds/kunpimoose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"That boy could simply make Jinyoung mad without even opening his mouth, but at the same time... He seemed the most vivid thing that had Junior's been close in the last years. And it made him feel alive."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1. Get Out

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!!! I'm trying my first attempt to post a JinBam fanfic, since I started to ship them so hard. I hope you like it! I'll try to translate it the best I can, but english is not my first language, sorry about any mistakes! ♥

Jinyoung was the type of person who doesn't get easily excited with things that life had to offer. In fact, he didn't need too much to realize how everything seemed uninteresting in his eyes, since even if things were like he liked it to be, he couldn't feel the difference or perhaps something different shining inside him.

One of the unique and rare times that he felt so glassy and excited about something was when he had finally found what he wanted to do in life and a career, achieving his goals fast, and that moment was his greatest victory.

The problem started after that, to be more precisely. He was going well, fulfilled goals and achieved his dream, even being so young... He couldn't see the difference and vitality in the colors around him. This being the main reason for him to become a rude and cold person, enough to silence someone just with his eyes, his seriousness recognized by anyone.

Being a teacher was the only thing that took him out of the bed and didn't make him give up, since he still had a very great attachment to his profession. Jinyoung liked what he did and couldn't think about a future without it. But that was as unique as his difficult genius.

His vacations were bathed in frustration and stress by the simply feeling of being unable to do something or find something else that he'd like to, taking his sleep, leaving him without knowing what he wanted in the moments of exaggerated tension. And it wouldn't be for lack of trying, because he already looked for everything. Music, sports, games, nothing distracted him from his boredom.

He gave thanks to heaven when he received a school's e-mail talking about the reunion before the classes started, making him relieved and excited enough to open it with a smile. The vacations of the middle of the year were always the most extensive in his point of view, probably because of the lack of holidays.

He couldn't wait to admire the face of his class as he stepped into the room, knowing that he was known as a dictator in the school he taught. In one hand, he loved it. In the other, he hated it, given that the principal was always on his tail telling him to slow down his behavior. However, he knew that he was one of the best teachers, despite the fame.

His lectures were simple and used advantageous methods, the result of extensive studies in schools, which cost him much of his teens and sleep. His efforts had earned him what few students of the modern times would be able to get, but he could at least try to pass his knowledge.

And that's why he took a lot of time preparing his lessons with dynamic content and very well formulated. Simple, direct, there was no errors.

It was full of himself that he stepped into the class room the first time in the morning, getting thousands of girls and boys rushing to come up their seats as soon as possible.

\- I demand you all in your places and in silence until I finish to fix my stuff on the table. The vacation was good, but it's over. - He didn't hear a peep and that was one of his satisfactions. - Open your books, we have an important subject to learn. - His eyes ran by the students, admiring a single face which he had never seen before in the classroom. - Hey you. - He called the boy. - What are you doing in my class?

\- Me? - The boy pointed to himself, frowning, don't getting the situation.

\- Yes, it's you. I want to know why you're in my classroom. Come on, before I report to the principal. - He was approaching slowly, waiting for the boy's answer.

\- I don't care, really. You as a teacher should know why I'm here.

The boy shrugged, before returning to the position, with the same indifferent, carefully choosing his materials. The rest of the class, in other hand, was silent, perhaps frightened, knowing how much their teacher could be mad.

\- Who do you think you are to treat me with insolence? - His hands leaned over the boy's table, making this turn his attention to his face. That indifference sigh that came out of his nostrils left him angrier than he thought he could get a day.

\- If it helps you, I wish I wasn't here. So, if you want, call the principal. The only thing I want is to have a lesson in peace and leave here as soon as possible. - Thin hands wandered through his hair before they rest on the notebook.

Junior burned in anger. None of his students dared to treat him like this, and now a stranger, who had no such freedom, invaded his tranquility and told him things as if he could and if he was his friend? This irritated him in a way he wasn't in ages.

\- Well, I'll give you five minutes to pack your things and follow me to the principal. - His blood boiled ridiculously, feeling tempted to scream when he saw him roll his eyes before start packing his things. - And you... - pointed to the other ones in the class. - Do the activities page 145 to 158. I want clean answers!

He snorted before stopping at the door and watch the kid with a face of no friends accompany him. Luckily, the boy didn't dare to say anything in the way or he probably would lost his mind.

Like he almost made when the director explained to him what the boy really was doing in his classroom.

\- He's transferred, professor Park. He recently arrived from Thailand and his parents sought our institution, since he came here alone. - That face was clearly one that judged him, while he could feel the younger's eyes on his back. - I think that it'd be obvious to you, so none of gave you a proper notice.

\- You thought wrong. - He answered, dead serious. - I need the boy's name on my call list. I want to know exactly what content he stopped. You know that it disrupts my classes.

\- Take it easy. He still doesn't understand fully Korean, but he' smart enough. He'll know explain what he saw and what he did not. Simple. Now go back to your class and take your lesson.

There was nothing more to be said. Ne needed to sigh before leaving the room with quick and heavy steps, followed by the red-haired boy.

\- Kunpimook. - The boy said suddenly.

\- What?

\- My name. Kunpimook.

\- I don't remember asking you. - He muttered.

\- As if I cared, I'm just saving me to speak to you the rest of the days.

 That's how Jinyoung breathed for the twentieth time that day.

_Huh?_

Throughout his history as a teacher, there was no student who had made him serious to the point of being unbearable to look at his face or hear his voice. But that kid got everything in one day, and he didn't even know what made him angrier: if it was the arrogant tone of his voice, his face of no friends or indifference.

That bothered him more than it should.

\- I hope you have the decency to treat me with respect and portray an apology. You're young, but I imagine that you have some education from home.

\- And I imagine that you haven't learned the same, neither in childhood or in your teens. And you owe me an apology because you're the one who got confused.

This time the boy picked up the pace, going ahead. With one last look at his professor, soon he dispersed and took his way to the classroom.

**xxx**

All the students stared at the teacher as he passed through the door, waiting for another sermon. Meanwhile, the Thai boy nipped the tip of his pencil, clearly not caring for the eyes of the rest of the classroom.

\- I hope you have finished the lesson. And you, Kupimok, isn't it? - He had to confirm.

\- Kunpimook. - He corrected without even look at him.

\- Whatever. Give me that lesson today, even if you have to stay after the class. - The boy shrugged again that day. - The others, attention to the subject now.

And then the class started. Junior always tried to get something to take points of the new student, but he seemed much smarter, saying the right answers that even the students who were with Jinyoung for years couldn't answer.

That surprised him and made him angry at the same time. Maybe it was the fact that for the first time, he had run into someone with a worse temper than his.

In the break, he watched his students out one by one, looking for the boy's face, which ironically, wasn't there. It was when he noticed that on his desk was the lesson that he was commanded to do.

The handwriting was almost flawless and the answers were well done. No drafts, no equations. That intrigued him. What would a boy from Thailand do in Korea, knowing everything he could taught? Steal his place? He snorted, biting his lower lip. The idea was ridiculous, but not discarted.

That boy had turned his enemy number one from this day.

And he would make sure that this is not good for him.


	2. 2. This is My Class

A week has passed. Junior's students were curious about the teacher's behavior, knowing that the current way he behaved was nothing like what they knew. It was as if they had put someone else to teach them or something like that.

It seemed that the young man had forgotten that other people were present in his classroom and now was just turning his attention to the new boy, who hadn't even exchanged words with someone of the class, he just stood there, quietly.

For those who saw from outside, they thought the boy was arrogant and rude, what helped him. Few knew that this was Kunpimook's real intention. Wasn't of his kind to be apathetic, but it had become necessary since several events that made him be here in that institution.

Often he wanted to sit and yell at everyone simply for not wanting to hear anyone speak. In other days, he just wanted to rush out and go home, his real home.

\- I want someone willing to answer me the result of this equation. - No one dared to raise a hand, causing the brunette to stare at his students, hopeful for any answer, right or wrong.

\- Twenty three. - The Thai in the background said loud enough, even if he still kept his eyes on the notebook without stop writing. He was too focused to take his eyes off the small notebook.

That frustrated Junior. Much more than he could imagine one day.

\- I imagine that you want to teach in my place, Mr. Buhwakul. - Literally spat the words, finally attracting the younger's attention.

\- Bhuwakul. - The boy snorted, dropping his pencil. - Do you prefer someone responds or the class remains silent? I spared the work of expectation.

\- What are you really doing here? - The question was totally thrown into contempt.

Perhaps Jinyoung was angry at that momento, because none of his students that he was so devoted in teaching couldn't answer, and someone who just arrived could answer without even looking. He didn't fail in... Everything.

\- I should be having classes with a teacher who could teach something to their students. But if you prefer, I can take your place, as you said just now. - The redhead wasn't afraid to face the teacher. In fact, he didn't care. At the bottom of his heart, he really didn't want and didn't need to be there.

\- I hope you get to measure these words if you want to stay in my class. From now on, you just take the word if I say you can or not. Otherwise, you still contained. - This time he stopped to examine the boy's face, frowning. He was buying a fight that'd cost him a lot.

\- Chài, sir "I Have Authority". - His eyes finally turned to stare at the notebook, slowly returning to write.

Jinyoung didn't know why he was so angry that the boy answer all of his questions, no matter how deep inside he knew that it was on purpoe. In the end, the question was out of his mouth.

Still, he decided to ignore that brat, turning his attention to his class, watching the boy every minute, hoping that the latter violated his rule, what clearly didn't happen. He didn't know if he was disappointed or happy at that moment.

Meanwhile, the Thai continued concentrated on his own world, even though he knew and felt the elder's gaze vibrating intensely on his head. That's why he first decided to look at him, easily finding the similar's look. That left him somewhat unresponsive, or perhaps lost and dull as never before, quickly diverting his attention to another point. He didn't want this, beyond the fact of wanting to ask him to stop to look at him.

He didn't intend to arrange a fight with the teacher but also wasn't one of those little boys who took frogs home and let down his head for rudeness. And he could agree that the man, who now taught algebra, seemed to be graduated in rudeness and other aspects of the same matter.

This was the main factor for the entire show of arrogant answers that happened this day. Didn't lie about the fact that he really didn't want to be there, adding more to the fact that he felt uncomfortable and cranky.

There were many things that he'd keep for himself since his parents had a finger in the reasons why he was there. In the end, he didn't want to hate them, but the task was more difficult than he thought.

He looked at him again, finding one more time that same look that he couldn't describe, it just looking, expecting some reaction or if he was trying to read it, which indeed could take him out of his comfort zone. He shook his head in disapproval, turning his eyes to the small notebook, maybe more embarrassed than before, trying to ignore the fact that his teacher would be watching him for the rest of the class.

And, really, Jinyoung watched closely, noting how the new student was living in a particular bubble, ready to expel anyone who tried and dared to enter. It wasn't something normal. He was used to see people communicating, telling their problems. But since he met the boy, he didn't see him smile once to tell story. It was as if the fact that he was there bothered him more than anything in the world. And that really bothered Junior.

Since his arrival, also hadn't fail to notice that every student seemed to be interested in wanting to know more about the boy. Everyone wanted until he who hated him. Or perhaps wanted to hate him and needed reasons for this.

And since then he noticed that in every break the boy simply disappeared after leaving the lesson at his desk with the same impeccable handwriting ever. Junior hadn't seen him deliver it and didn't see him exit, feeling curious to know how the boy was doing it.

He thought several times about how he had learned Korean that way, even coming suddenly to Korea. What was happening? What was his real reason there? There were so many questions he wanted to know the answer that his head hurt more than he thought it could.

Sometimes reading the boy's name in his call list, hitting the pronunciation in his head, sometimes forgetting what it was like. He imagined how it might be boring for the boy, since his name also came wrong from the people's mouth.

But he was amused at the end of all, because he wanted to annoy Kunpimook.

The truth was that he didn't know what he wanted... He was a child who had started a fight with a kid who barely reached puberty, but at the same time he thought about how he wanted to get him out of his sight because the boy annoyed him.

Maybe that was one of his biggest dilemmas, leading ideas and plotting how he could make the boy annoyed, since he did it even without doing anything.

Difficult, but not impossible.

**xxx**

One month has passed and, for the first time, he didn't see the boy disappear during the break, frowning when he found him in classroom, leaning on his arm. He appeared to be with boredom and worry, even with eyes closed.

\- Kupimoo? - He approached, trying to understand if the boy was fine, sharpening his view every step near to the other, leaning back in a chair.

\- Kunpimook. - He said serene, not worrying about opening his eyes to see the teacher's features who he sincerely didn't want to see. Not now.

\- Whatever. Why are you in the classroom? It's time for break. - He couldn't deny that he was curious.

\- I'm not in the mood to get out of here now. Do you want to throw me out or something?

Kunpimook's fingers played with his ring that looked like too wide for him, now looking more uneasy than serene. Jinyoung took his time watching that fingers playing there.

\- I suggest that if this is your intention, start looking for a cart or you're gonna take me away by force.

\- A month has passed and you haven't changed this behavior. I'm your teacher and elder than you. You owe me respect! - said more angry than before. How could someone be so difficult to deal?

\- What? I owe you respect? And why should I? - This time the boy raised his eyes to look at the teacher's face whom has finally made him get angry.

Had he forgotten how there was plagued from the beginning of the month he arrived? _"Besides arrogant, he's a poor memory",_ he thought to himself.

\- I just gave you obvious reasons. - He had noticed the change of mood in the boy's voice, almost smiling, feeling for the first time that he had achieved victory and without much effort on his part.

\- For now I'll give you a great reason to not treat you the way you want. - He paused, smiling as fake as he could. - I. Don't. Want. To. - He had to dot every word, before wetting his lips in pure contempt, running his fingers through his hair. His favorite habit.

\- Listen here, kiddo, you-.

\- You really helped me to wanna leave the room, excuse me. - The boy picked up a hardback book, a calendar and a pen before leaving in a hurry, leaving a brunette with closed eyes to the point of almost explode in pure bad mood.

Who that boy thought he was to cut him and turn his back while he was clearly talking to him?

That question seemed to have turned one of his official phrases since that him stepped into the classroom a month ago. Repeating it a lot of times: Who that guy think he is?

Jinyoung needed a lot of control to not kick the portfolio with the materials of the boy, remembering that if he did it, he would then collect everything.

_"Damn it..."_

It was all he could think of at the moment.

**XXX**

Not far away, one of the boys from the same classroom the foreigner rush to get out of there. Immediately recognized who he was, knowing that his teacher was still there. He connected the dots easily, knowing of recent events, because he spent more time than he should watching the discussions. Even more than watching the boys of the other classrooms.

\- Hey, I think the new student and the teacher argued again. - The boy nudged his friend, trying to draw his attention so he could look at the redhead too. - I don't know why the teacher is annoying him so much, sometimes he does nothing.

\- In fact, neither I, Youngjae.

 Mark also seemed intrigued enough, even if he seemed to be unconcerned with the facts. As he used to say _"mind your own business"_ , but couldn't avoid paying attention since everyone did.

\- I thought the professor had trouble with foreigners, but he treats you well, hyung. - The boy paused a moment to scratch his nose. - And look that you got here somewhat belatedly in the subjects, even if he was having to redo all the stuff.

\- I don't know. I never really understood the teacher, to be honest. - The American gestured with his hands, as if there were something that he could touch in the air. - He just seems like another person. The noise of a needle used to the stress him and he'd discount in his students, but now he doesn't even care when we exchange sheets of papers almost in front of his nose.

\- And look that he has bionic eyes! - The elder of the two had to laugh at the younger's exclamations.

Youngjae was a funny guy and he was grateful to not be alone with those thoughts he kept.

\- Even we don't know the story, he cares more when the boy answers right.

\- It's been a month that they remain worse than a cat and mouse in the hallway. - The blonde had to agree. - Sometimes I wonder why he came to Thailand knowing that much, and maybe friends with him. As much as he's serious and quiet, he seems lonely... Don't you think?

Youngjae agreed, lowering his eyes.

Sometimes for them it was difficult, since they were there for them and only them. They couldn't imagine what it was like to be in another place which was unfamiliar and worse, alone. Even Mark couldn't understand.

Silence skirted both for a few minutes before the break ended as the school's signal resonate through the palce, causing both to raise reluctantly.

Were that way they could stare at the same young man they were talking about before he crossed to the other side of the school to enter the classroom shared with both. His face didn't look very happy and maybe he could be three times angrier than when Jinyoung bothered him. Mark had to restrain himself to not go talk to the boy.

It was as if he had come out of a place thatt he had discussed and ended up in another to discuss even more.

And indeed it was. The redhead sat in his place, massaging his temples, soothing the headache that seemed to reach him harshly. Even at that moment he wanted to send everyone in class to close their goddamn mouths, wanting only to be somewhere quiet where he could write with calm and peace. Something that he'd only accomplish in his own thoughts or own dreams than experiencing it there.

He wondered if he should leave the room and go to the principal, trying to somehow obtain a license to leave for the rest of the week, but it was obvious he'd not make it, what did made him stay with his eyes closed. Maybe that way he'd disappear from that place.

Not that it really would happen. He sighed, trying to figure out when it was that his life had been taken by bad luck.

\- Mr. Kupimok? - A familiar voice echoed through the room. It seemed that the bell rang several times in his mind, making his head throb.

\- K u n p i m o o k. - Spelled before opening his eyes. He wasn't with patience to discuss with the teacher.

Not now, and asked internally for him to simply return his attention to the rest of the class.

\- I suggest that if you want to sleep, do it in the principal's office. - The elder replied before pointing to the contents of the whiteboard. - This subject is important and needs attention. I don't really have time to get back if you have any difficulties.

\- The answer is X with atomic number 7 and mass 14. - The smallest boy rubbed his forehead waiting for Jinyoung, who was standing in front of the blackboard, explode. Which clearly didn't take long to happen.

\- I remember being clear about the fact that you only answer when I let you do so. - His arms were positioned in front of his body, containing the urge to shake the boy's head until it exploded in the midst of his hands.

At this stage of the game, the entire class had stopped their business just to pay attention to both that were now in the midst of a discussion, even if they recently came back from the break's tranquility. Youngjae and Mark kept watching only to discuss the return home later.

\- And I remember that in a few minutes ago you called my name and asked my attention about this content. Why don't you upgrade your classes and offers your students something new that they'll really enjoy? Every teacher has taught it! - He gestured. He'd have a big problem with that headache with the rest of his day. He didn't want to say it, but when he saw, it had already left.

\- Brat, you--

\- I have a name, it's in your call list if you need to know what it is. - He snapped.

\- Get out of my classroom now! - The elder's face was so red that it seemed to be about to explode. - This is my classroom! My rules, my content. And you should follow them! I don't want you here again. - Exalted was how he could determine the brunette at that time.

\- Oh, you don't know how I'm upset to hear that. - The voice was laden with irony, while the agile hands took care of his material, putting them in his backpack, crossing  the classroom until he got out of it. He raised his right hand, playing a farewell.

_"This kid..."_

It was all that Junior could think of before having to take possession of his water bottle and try to calm down in front of his students, who seemed to be with no reaction.

\- Page two hundred thirty-eight. Read the text and answer the questions. I don't want anyone talking or diverting attention from the book that isn't for something important. - He complained. - I'm going away for a few minutes and hopefully find this classroom in peace.

It was the last thing he said before leaving the classroom across the hall. It was obvious he would talk to the principal, really didn't want the boy in his classroom. At least not him, but the oldman seemed to disagree with the idea to take him out and put him in another room.

\- Professor Park, I know you have your methods and teaching ways, but unfortunately I cannot place the student in another classroom. I committed to leave the boy in your hands when I talked to his parents before receiving his transfer. You're the best teacher of this school, everyone knows it. - And he was already regretting bitterly.

\- And that's why I'll be forced to endure that brat almost walking in my head and responding to me? - Stammered incredulously.

\- The boy's just too stressed out, he must have his reasons. I'll call you to talk so you both calm down. And I want you together.

Junior refused. He knew the principal would do nothing since he had his own problems and worst students to deal with, and he knew exactly the difficult genius of Jinyoung.

\- That's it, make that kid improve his behavior or I'm gonna stop him myself from entering my classroom. - He remembered being clear, looking at the other man shook his head in affirmation. He rised to take his course, once again walking through the school halls.

He just wanted to unwind, forget how stressed he was all, faithfully believing how it all seemed difficult. Jinyoung still  thought that it wouldn't change anytime soon, and he started to think he should trying to ignore all at once and forget that one day the Thai had existed. Restart.

But he hated beginnings and one of the current reasons why he rejected the idea, it was because he felt that deep, he needed that extreme dose of the rude boy which he always argued with. It was a new chapter, a new thing that called Junior's attention as much as he hated to admit it, even inside his mind.

He didn't understand and it was more than written on his forehead.

He devoted himself to kick the ground, until something stole his attention and it was exactly his object of hate.

Not many meters from where he was, he could watch the boy sitting in the grass where the sun was shining hard. Head down low, didn't know exactly how the boy was, but could see an earphone attached to his left ear. The scene was strange. He felt weird watching the boy there, decorating each point. For some odd reason, he couldn't help it.

The boy fidgeted uncertainly, raising his face, putting his hands on the small notebook that Jinyoung recognized as his partner, considering he took it up and down everywhere he goes. It was his object of affection, as well as the pen in pastels' colors.

In his view, it seemed to have something connected to his liking or simply was a special gift. He seemed to admire a fixed point of the object, leaving the strange scene for anyone who saw outside. It would be complicated trying to decipher what the boy planned at that moment.

He was alarmed when he threatened to throw it away, just noting that the boy fell almost immediately, grabbing it harder than the beginning.

He wondered what he thought. What did he want?

Junior wanted to know, wanted to ask. He wanted to have a productive conversation for the first time with the redhead. And that's what led his feet reluctantly in the others' direction. He wasn't in a rush, but the distance collaborated to go fast. He thought of a thousand things he could say, without success, startled when the boy's tone went through his hearing.

\- Please, I just want to enjoy my time in peace, whoever you are, leave me alone. - At that moment Kunpimook turned to stare at the brunette's face, sighing with all his strength. Deep down he really was the last person the redhead wanted to run into.

\- You know I'm the teacher and I can't let my students loose class period in the yard. -  He tried to be careful for the first time in his life, making a disapproving noise came out of the other's lips.

\- As I remember, it was you who started kicking me. - Snapped.

\- You gave me every reason to-

\- I really don't want to discuss, please. - It was a simple request. - If you came here to this again, let me know and I'll go somewhere else.

\- No... - He stepped back a bit, noting that the words were out of his mouth as easy as never imagined they could. - I noticed you there and for some reason, I wanted to have a normal conversation with you. - He began, hesitating a little more when he received the boy's gaze, perhaps surprised. - Since the beginning I know we've not gotten along.

\- And I think we'll not. - The Thai scored. - I'm sorry, but from the beginning I know that we would not get along well, really. - He was struggling, Junior could feel that the boy didn't speak as firmly as he wanted to, so he knew was lying.

But why?

\- It's never too late for anything. - He shrugged, trying to keep the situation under control.

\- It's late. It's always late. I don't know where do you get the idea that it's never too late for things. From my point of view, it's always late for everything. To say, to feel, to go back. It's always like that.

The way he talked seemed to hit every point of his mind, daring to try to understand what  was all that about. He wanted to understand the "you" that the boy used the phrase more than anything.

\- This isn't the kind of thinking that young people should have. You're young, you have a lot ahead.

\- Want to be bossy with my thoughts too? - Commented angry, quickly rising. - I don't want to think about how I'm going forward. Preferably, I don't want to think about anything. - It was the last thing the boy said before leaving tapping his foot, rushing away.

Before he could call the boy's attention, his eyes stopped on the object thrown on the lawn. The diary. In the background, he thought whether he should call him to return, but his fingers itched annoyingly, asking him to touch the object in front of him. And that's what he did, not lingering to admire the cover.

_"Bambam's memories."_

Not sure what the first word meant, but he imagined it was something related to the boy, once again, he didn't know and had a feeling that would soon find out.

Or woudn't, if his conscience doesn't weigh heavily, preventing him from opening the personal object there in the middle of the courtyard, a fine line between curiosity and good deeds to not poke in where he hadn't been called.

Decided that was time to go back to his classroom, leaving to think what he should do after, also keeping the weight for another time.

He wasn't surprised when he didn't find the boy in the classroom,  he didn't expect him to be there. Judging by the rest of the looks, they asked the same question was Junior: Where was he, then? It was like a mystery. And really, he hated mysteries. Because they were things that intrigued him more than they should.

He decided to resume his lecture, since there wasn't enough time and  he needed to finalize the subjects, hardly focusing his attention there, since his eyes always came to land on the diary on his desk.

Whatever it was what he was thinking or even feeling, he hadn't yet learned how to deal, neither descibre.

It was useless, but he'd ignore by now.


	3. 3. Why?

Two days. A weekend. Forty-eight hours. Two thousand eight hundred and eighty minutes. One hundred and seventy-two thousand eight hundred seconds.

Jinyoung felt frozen in time, walking from one side to the other, stopping only to take in the agenda hand that he took the day before, wondering what to do.

He spent almost the entire weekend struggling with his conscience about what to do with the object. He tried to get distracted, review materials, update content, notes... But his mind kept returning to the same point, frustrating him even more. The more he tried to ignore it, more he thought about it.

Thought it was unfair the fact that he had an object that could be a journal and the boy who had lost were looking for this desperately. After all, it wasn't liike he'd like if someone read one of his personal belongings.

But there was still something that Jinyoung felt he should know. He wanted to find out, he wanted to understand. Explanations that he knew wouldn't come from the boy's mouth. And when he imagined he asking it for the boy, in his head it didn't seem to end well, since never they've had a proper conversation even when he gave the chance.

It was exactly why he couldn't contain himself and finally opened the agenda, but not before taking all breath possible and sit on the couch in his living room, perhaps having that as the only available time to change his mind.

His fingers touched delicately the first sheets, noting the handwriting that he little understood, identifying that it was clearly Thai. He was disappointed, but deep down, was feeling better. So he couldn't worry about the weight of his soul.

However, he noticed that the boy began to write in Korean, sometimes letting random words in his native language.

He didn't spend much of his time thinking, just kept reading.

There, the boy was talking to someone for whom he had great affection, telling all that he had passed and his antics. He narrated how it could be beautiful next to the other boy and the Korean classes were getting better. Junior didn't know why, but he could see the boy writing each line with a smile on his face, as much as he had never seen such a smile coming from the Thai. He started to giggle.

And so he began to swallow the redhead's memories, noting the evolution of the language. He read the name "Kim Yugyeom" several times, this one seemed to be his friend. Perhaps part of the reason why he's learned Korean so fluently.

**"He was always around, holding me and being who I wanted the most to see happy. That was the kind of best friend I asked to heaven and I've gained. Even if there were barriers, but we were good enough to break them. He was indeed an angel, which showed me my hero... One of which I feel that I'll never forget. "**

Jinyoung felt deep down how much the boy semeed to like who he spoke of, knowing there was another someone in the middle of his thoughts. The only problem, however, was the lack of his name.

If it wasn't the Yugyeom boy, who could it be?

**"I had the sweetest dreams with him. I was sure I liked him and perhaps he had the same feelings for me. But I'm afraid he may not feel the same as I feel. I'm afraid to be just small. Special, but small... Maybe I should tell Yugyeom. Maybe he can help me..."**

_"Then the boy..."_

Trying to not have a hasty reaction, ge tried to put in his head that he was reading wrong.

He quickly turned to the next page, hoping to find more, coming across with a few sheets torn angrily, frowning immediately. What could be there? Rejection?

It looked like it had been extended for a month, judging by the date of the sheet that had been spared. The sheet he was reading now was corresponding to the day when he accompanied him to the principal thinking he wasn't a student of his.

**"I called you. I needed to say that I miss you and that I've gone. Maybe you were looking for me... Or maybe not. After all, it's been a few months since I got here. I can't hate you for some odd reason. And it hurts... But maybe don't hurt as much as the fact that you said over and over that it was a mistake... Why? What have I done so wrong?**

**I feel strange and terrible. I wanted to run back, I just didn't want to be here, where I am. I didn't want to exist.**

**I didn't want you in my thoughts now, hyung. But for some reason, you don't leave me. You simply continue inside my head, playing, smiling. You're still the first thing I think about every morning and remains the person who takes my sleep when I try to sleep.**

**It's been hard... But I promised I wouldn't waver and, when I left, I would live a completely different life. I would live as someone which you've never met, because I don't want that same feeling for another person other than you.**

**Because I don't know if I could stand to remember that people could make me what you did and do to me... "**

Junior sighed feeling the boy's pain. Why so much compassion suddenly? Not that he's passed for that kind of situation one day. Maybe so, but not like that.

He felt bad for having done the boy's day worse for something he had done wrong.

His eyes paused over other pages trying to find his name in the midst of them, but there was no sign of him - deep down it frustrated him- unless the several times he repeated that every day was hard, feeling that part of it was his fault.

The last page then came.

**"You made me swallow my pride again. I'm sorry I still remember your number, inadvertently kept it in memory. You always said I had a good memory and maybe that would help me in the future. I don't see that this has helped me now.**

**Yugyeom told me that you could change number and it was better that I give up to go after you. But I wasn't sure that he said it for my sake. It seems that everyone I come close, they walk away. Am I that bad?**

**I said I missed our laughter and our friendship, but he just told me he didn't want to get into that topic, because certain things we should only let into the past.**

**You know, it hurts enough...**

**My only friend simply doesn't act more like my friend. My best friend.**

**So why do you assume that I should live and forget you, you who did so much presence in my life besides making me well when something wasn't good? You, who inadvertently made me see that I had potential? Someone from which I could run and cry when things weren't going right?**

**But that has now become nothing. Even though I have all that one day you said I would... So why I don't have you? Why are you the only thing I can't have?**

**I know that part of the fault is not yours and my parents have a finger on it. But I told you we could convince them. I said, but you wouldn't listen. You took your side.**

**And now, I'm here looking at the roof after a discussion with you on the phone, throwing words on the only thing I kept from you and that's just the only thing I wanted to destroy, but  I can't.**

**The only thing I dedicated myself and that one day I expected you to see... But I may not have much success...**

**You always said that we must have hope and it's never too late. But unfortunately, I think you lied, because I really don't see anything for the future...**

**Because we always believe in liars, hyung.**

**Or maybe I chose like this, chose to believe them... "**

Now it made sense in his head, the last dialogue he had had with the boy. In fact, he perfectly understood the boy's behavior, even taking time to digest each word and the disappointment of not having found his name there. Both feelings at the moment seemed too bad.

But still it had left the question: What really happened?

He knew by the time the boy had fallen in love with someone... But who? Why had he gone so suddenly? He felt certain lack of torn sheets, frustrated by not understanding, even having read so much of the boy's memories.

This was what caused him to have the worst night of sleep, he couldn't take the redhead and his words from his mind.

He'd have serious problems from now on...

**xxx**

Little Jinyoung knew that the boy's weekend resembled perfectly to his, just changing the thoughts.

He knew very well who was in possession of his agenda, wishing strongly that he was wrong, even if it didn't bring him any peace. He didn't know if he hated the last person he had spoken or hated the fact that he was so airhead and let the one thing he couldn't forget on the ground for those who wanted to pick it.

Although he tried to keep looking at the ceiling of the room that still was quite strange, he couldn't divert his thoughts. Sometimes he thought of the brunette's face, sometimes on the agenda.

That opened him a space for debating on that kind of situation in his life, wondering how this turn around could happen. Often he heard that everything happened for a cause and, in most cases, this cause was good.

But he couldn't find the good side of everything in any of the situations that occurred. He couldn't find the good side of being away from his things, his home, his brothers, his friends and his best friend.

He really missed Yugyeom and should admit that much of his displacement was from missing the boy.

He closed his eyes, trying to inhibit any kind of thinking, feeling the reached an erupting point, which meant that his eyes soon sprout tears. He didn't want and shouldn't cry. And finally, he didn't want to be turning in bed, forcing himself again to sleep.

He didn't want that kind of situation, because it was certainly a easy way for someone walk into his world, his fears, his internal dialogue.

And he repeated that it was obviously the type of situation that he was running  away in the recent days, since he stepped a foot in the school, posing as someone quiet and would remain like this until the end.

It hadn't been for what happened, of course. And maybe he was determined to change things.

It was thinking that way he popped in the school, making sure to be one of the first students, only longing for the arrival of the person who he had the strongest dialogues in recent days, wishing, deep down, that all have been just a misunderstanding of his brain and that things would be fine in the end.

Uneasy, he was in front of the teachers' room, not knowing exactly what to expect and for the first time in days, he felt a fear that he had no chance of being able to contain it. Because it was like his days have been recently... Feel and can't control, no matter how strong he was.

And the fear was increased when he came across the one he was seeking and running away at the same time, not knowing how to start, still watching the look that the teacher threw at him.

\- Any doubt about the homework? - It was simplistic, but he knew exactly what the student wanted there at that hour of the morning.

\- My agenda. - He asked firmly. He was afraid to falter.

\- How do you know it is with me? - Junior asked, feigning disinterest. In the his deep, he didn't want to show what he thought, little knowing that his eyes prevented him from lying. It was the fact that everyone knew that the man couldn't lie at all.

\- You were the last one who I was debating with and because of you I let it on the ground to anyone pick it. You're not blind and I believe your glasses are useful for something, not only to let you just with an smart look that every teacher likes to pass on to his students. - The boy took a deep breath. He had no patience and if his teacher continued, he'd explode for once.

On the other hand, Junior just took a deep breath, holding himself back to not start another argument, even if the boy's words had annoyed him almost in a colossal way. That's why he chose to turn his back to Kunpimook, muttering to the latter wait.

What clearly made the younger ease up, at the same time he found this calm kinda odd. He barely had time to breathe when he saw his agenda in the hands of the teacher.

\- Your luck was that my glasses served for something and I found it. - Commented somewhat uncertain about what he was going to say. - But I'll only give it back to you if you tell me something. I mean... - He cleared his throat slightly. - Tell me the meaning or whatever it is.

Kunpimook raised an eyebrow, curious as to what would be the next thing that the brunette would say to him.

\- Depending on the question, yes. - The surreal fear he had before has returned to settle in his body again. Another internal dialogue came into his head, wondering whether or not start running away as soon as possible.

\- Bambam is some kind of nickname or...?

The boy was relieved almost immediately.

\- What is the curiosity about my nickname? And yes, it's a nickname that was given to me a while ago... - Junior could see the bitterness through the boy's eyes, feeling guilty for having brought it up.

\- I just need an easier name to call you, you know... - The elder knew how the situation was strange and seemed increasingly serious, but he basically wanted to know more of the boy and stuff.

\- Oh... I see... - The boy smiled and at that time Junior seemed  to have a victory. - Maybe you want a pronunciation lesson of my real name? I can help you with that. - Or not.

\- What would be the problem call you that?

\- Everything. - And that was enough to back off, watching the boy reaching out to return the book, taking the opportunity to swing his fingers as if he was calling him. But not before watching the boy hesitate a little. - Did you read it?

He perfectly understand why at that moment. It was then that he's internal conflict began, not knowing whether to tell the truth or try to lie again. Not like he cared to what the Thai thought or anything, but he felt bad because it was something personal and it wouldn't be that way he would be able to help the boy.

And he really wanted to help him in some way.

\- I didn't. - It was the only he said, staring at the boy nibbling his bottom lip. - I figured it was invasion of privacy and didn't want to do with that-

His voice was heavily cut by the loud ringing from the boy's cell phone, the latter stuck his hands in his jacket's pocket, pulling it, frowning. The dark feature took over his face, making Junior back off even more, especially when he turned away before a "hyung?" and left him there with the extended journal and almost talking to himself.

Concern, uncertainty and guilt. It was all he could feel, while worshiping the boy's silhouette disappear by the end of the hall, praying that his feet wouldn't take off the ground to go after the boy.

Again, his eyes fell on the "Bambam" pasted on the agenda, sighing.

Perhaps he would have to stay one more time with the object, struggling with his conscience.

**xxx**

As expected, Junior wasn't graced with the presence of the redhead in his class, sighing. Students threw curious glances to the teacher and themselves, trying to understand what could have happened after the fight that day.

Mark stared Youngjae who frantically wrote on a piece of paper, ready to pass to his friend. There was less expected, since they spent almost half of the weekend arguing about the development of the whole story.

_"Do you think he expelled the new student? He didn't seem to mind his absence! I remember when Yeri missed a day and he almost squandered the patience of the fact that she had been missing and about not knowing why she had been missing"_

The elder boy opened the paper, managing to clearly hear the other's voice while reading. And indeed, he remembered how much the teacher wasn't quiet until he saw the girl as a whole the next day in his classroom.

_"I don't know, it doesn't seem like he's even a little bit concerned about Kunpimook not showing up in class. Maybe the principal has changed his class"_

He quickly passed back the paper to the boy, eager for an answer.

\- Youngjae and Mark, if I see you again passing papers during my class, you'll lose the break solving arithmetic. - Mark frowned, cutting his neck to his friend, still wondering. His teacher wasn't one who warned and he no longer knew the animal had bitten him.

Junior turned his attention to the board, before sighing and returning his attention to the faces that stared at him now.

\- Have you seen Kunpimook today? - Mark glanced to Youngjae.

\- I'm here. - The voice came out of the door, a little bit embarrassed because of the eyes on him, as he walked somewhat clumsy with a paper in hand, soon extending to the teacher who now watched him. - I needed a few minutes away and here is a paper justification.

It was the last thing he said before making his way toward the his usual placec and sit, throwing one last look that the teacher clearly knew what it meant.

\- We're going over the last subject because some of your classmates didn't understand, page two hundred sixty-three. - He admired the boy's behavior then nodded. He didn't know if that was just a mask or if the boy was defending himself from something that was upset and didn't want to show.

What he knew was that that kind of behavior didn't suit him well.

Maybe they had found something that they surely had in common: They didn't know how to lie.

And that caused him some discomfort as he tried to focus on the numbers he needed to teach, always taking a look at the redhead that seemed to beg for break time and get away from his class to go to some isolated place.

Not that he suddenly understood the boy, he could see what he made him see. He could see what the boy left outside the barrier he had built heavily around him, hoping no one could penetrate. And Junior couldn't tell whether it was better not get envolved or try to have a friendly relationship with his student.

Kunpimook intrigued him, that was pure and completely new, different... This animated him as he had never had the chance in years.

And that way, he could tell how his classes flowed better, his students seemed to absorb more. Time ran quickly, he knew that the break had come when he heard the school's bell ringing and his students up to take their snacks.

He started to walk to the boy, moving to pick Kunpimook's journal in his bag and then extend it to him.

\- I haven't read, before you ask. You've gone before I could deliver it and finish explaining to you.

\- I had a problem on the phone. - He didn't extend or step back. - Anyways, thank you for returning me and haven't read. - The kid really thought he hadn't read or was faking? He wouldn't know.

Gradually the stood still, sitting there in his seat, leaving confusion planted in the brunette's face. Wouldn't he go out?

\- Are you going to stay here the whole break? - Junior asked carefully. - The weather has improved and isn't so cold. They're serving snacks too. - Watched the crowded courtyard of students, choosing a comfortable place to sit.

\- I don't want to, can I only stay here? - The Thai knew what his teacher was trying to do and didn't really want it.

\- You can, but it's good to eat. You may lose content if you need to go to the infirmary because of a diet. - The boy looked up now watching the teacher who held his breath.

Those eyes...

He didn't know what was the wave of feeling that passed throught him, trying hard to read what was happening. While, on the other hand, the other tried remain his position, unable to divert his attention. They spent minutes just enjoying how strongly they tried to read each other, ending with the youngest looking away, joining hands to support his chin.

However, Jinyoung still watched the scene, focusing an hour or another in his hands and fingers a little full of rings.

The boy actually had some sort of obsession with accessories and clearly about his appearance, which since then was flawless and there was no one who wouldn't have failed to notice it.

\- I can eat anytime, I live near. - Junior just nodded, now stopping to think he didn't know exactly where and in what region the other lived, thinking it would be too much to ask.

\- Wanna walk a little? - The redhead looked up, staring at the other curiously. - I mean... Staying in the classroom don't help much. I know you said you want to be alone, but it's not good. And I'm tired of they thinking I'll kick you out in every argue.

Kunpimook pressed his lips together, thinking, indeed. He stood up and so did Junior, understanding the message.

They walked to the field, where some students were playing some kind of game that he had never stopped to understand. Even silently, one waited for the other to take the initiative to strike up a conversation.

\- I hope that today you're less angry to talk. - The shortest shrugged, directing his gaze to the sky, before sitting down. Jinyoung did the same.

\- We can't just pretend to understand each other while we're silent? I don't want to go through it, it's embarrassing and not my type. - The boy scratched his neck and glanced Jinyoung.

_"Liar..."_

Such a liar as he was.

\- You know, I don't want to be boring or-

\- You are already.

\- All right, even if I am, but I really want to have some kind of conversation with you, you're my student. I don't even know what subject you stopped in. - He took a deep breath.

\- I know a lot more than you think I know, I learned a lot more than you think I learned. We don't need that kind of conversation because you're my teacher and I'm your student. Do you always have this kind of thinking? - He didn't really understand the boy's question, shrugging. - Nevermind.

\- Not just that, but you decided to isolate and it hurts. Trust me, you need to enjoy the time you have.

\- I don't want to.

\- But I don't want you to be alone. - A snort was audible enough. - Look... I didn't really have the best adolescence and childhood of my life, because I was always covered in studies and seeking to give pride to my parents. It wasn't hard, but now I see that I missed much of what I could've taken advantage of. And that's what I try to recover from all my students, not just because it's you. I would do it for anyone.

The Thai lowered his head, entertaining himself with a piece of grass. What made the teacher even more restless than he was in the last minute.

\- I appreciate what you're doing, professor. - He commented quietly. - But I really don't want it, it may be difficult for you to understand, but for me it's easy to be that way.

\- I don't see a way that is easier. There are options. How will you digest it all in the future? - He already see a discussion coming on the way, already breathing the necessary, engulfing the silence that his company offered him instead of an answer.

He closed his eyes, throwing his head back to stare at the sky.

The weather was unsettled. Gray clouds over a blue sky trying to strongly appear. This was how he saw the boy, after all.

Someone who had a lot to show, good things to offer, sweet words to devote. Someone who chose to hide it for a gray cloud of apathy and rudeness.

Junior had never thought that it might be possible and didn't believe the boy was so hopeless to the point of not wanting to listen to his words, choosing to ignore everything.

It was like the poems he had never learned to read in high school, but his friends all knew. That kid was a living poem that had entered his life suddenly, without words to offer and he knew that irritated him because he didn't know how to decipher it.

Again he lowered his head, closing his eyes before taking a breath, ready to call the boy in a slightly loud and angry tone for being ignored for so long.

\- Yah, Kupimok!

\- Bambam.

Junior took a few seconds to digest the sentence befor smiling, unaware that the boy did the same at that moment.

This was his first major victory, he knew that.


	4. 4. Jealous

A week has passed normally. There wasn't fights, there wasn't something that could be disagreed until now. Junior felt good, but couldn't deny that, even if they were acting the way they should since the day they talked in the stands, their relationship hasn't changed.

They're still complete strangers to each other.

Jinyoung just couldn't understand how he could break Bambam's social barrier when he just didn't give him an opening so he could learn more, talk, deal with it and related things.

Later that week, when the boy didn't solve disappear, he invited him to share their time or something, eventually, most of the time, share their silences. Always ended by realizing that Jinyoung opened more and more, and the boy went near the zero point of the scale.

A scale that wouldn't rise even if he insistent to.

After all, he was frustrated and even irritated for no reason, because he didn't know exactly why he was getting so angry with something of that type and even less: Didn't know why he needed to be so close to the boy.

Junior was believing he needed a second opinion on the case, but he had no one to talk to and actually didn't want to, at the end of everything.

Meanwhile, Bambam still stuck in his same world, occasionally admiring the teacher in their internal debates, noting how gradual was being the brunette's behavior, slapping himself internally for not having refused the first day he was invited to go to the stands.

In his head, they coul run away from that kind of stage where one insisted on the friendship and all kinds of thing that irritated him now in a deep way. He simply didn't need it and, from the beginning, had been a mistake.

Now his head was divided into two problems: His teacher who wouldn't drop his foot so early, and the fact of wanting to swallow his pride and his heart, trying his best to inhibit the desire to pick his phone in hand and call his hyung.

Often he felt like he was living the most stupid story of all time, closing his eyes after much concentration and opening them, trying to think that everything that was going on was no more than a very bad nightmare, and he would wake up if the did it a lot of times.

But it just didn't happen even in his dreams, and he didn't know how nightmares were housed in a world where only good things should be admitted.

Thinking about it brought the ghost of his countless headaches, he pressed his eyes together, waiting from the bottom of his heart that everything changed suddenly again in less time than expected.

**xxx**

Junior had been requested on the principal's office, asking why he had received that kind of call. He didn't expect to take any scolding, he hadn't done anything wrong in the past few days, concluding that nothing had gone wrong.

Carefully, he opened the door of his superior, passing his head through the doorway, staring the principal who smiled. Relief.

\- Did you call me? - It was rhetorical, but he didn't care.

\- Yes, I have a brief request to you. - The teacher nodded, watching the other fixing the documents he had on the table. - Do you know the janitor? Ricky?

\- The Wang? I know, of course! - It was a little hard not to know him, since he knew that he worked there in years, having studied at school as well. - I think everyone knows.

\- Great. I need to deliver it to him. He also wants to meet you, as you assume the third year classes soon, isn't it? - The teacher nodded. - At least then you get to know his son.

Soon he took the papers from the other man, before leaving the room, taking his new direction.

The part where the caretaker was in very specific and isolated area at school. A simple house, but was good enough to survive with a small family. Didn't suffered from payment of rents or light. It was perfect.

Junior was in his world before he stopped near the hall and carefully listen to a voice which clearly recognized.

"Bambam?"

That voice, that he hadn't the opportunity to hear once when sharing the same space, was now talking a lot to none other than the son of the caretaker himself.

\- Bambam, you could have told me you knew Mark! - The Thai rolled his eyes, as if he were already familiar with the insistence.

\- I already told you I don't know him, my God! I'm just in the same class with him, but I've never said a word to him. Why don't you talk to him? It's easier! - The boy said before leaning in a corner.

\- Because... Well... When I entered high school, I tried to approach him, but I think I screwed things up... - His face was unhappy and wondered why. Meanwhile, the second person looked at him questioningly. - All right, I made a cheesy pickup line.

\- Like what?

\- I asked if it hurt when he fell from heaven.

That was the first time that Junior heard Bambam's laughter, thinking it was one of the most charmings that he had the opportunity to listen.

\- Do not laugh! It was traumatic, okay?

\- Sorry, hyung. - The redhead had a moment to clear the corners of his eyes and sigh. - That's the worst pickup line. If you used it with me, I'd be mad.

\- Do you think he hates me? - The blonde now asked afraid, not knowing exactly how to act.

\- I don't know, I said I'd do that, not him.

Bambam looked at the other's expression, not knowing how to deal with Jackson that looked like a child without his candy.

\- Hyung, you know I'm kidding. I don't know how to approach people and I don't have the courage to call him in the classroom... I hate crowds and people looking at me too.

\- But you don't need to call him in the middle of the class. - The boy had the same face of an abandoned puppy.

\- Jackson... - The boy sighed. - I know it's hard, but you need to get over it, right? I mean... Not that I don't want to help you, but just thinking about it my hands start to sweat, look! - Not only they were sweating, as trembling. Would it be a weakness?

\- You have more chances than me!

\- Jesus, where did I tie my horse? - Bambam threw his head back. - I don't know what I had in mind when I decided to be friends with you. - Unlike other times, Junior could understand that it was a joke and worse, he envied the other boy since he had achieved what he couldn't in weeks.

While unwittingly he hated the other boy for this reason, and that was just something he couldn't admit that he was feeling because he didn't know why he was feeling.

\- You know you're the best, right? - Jackson put his arm around the taller boy, taking the opportunity to mess up his hair, drawing a disapproving look of the boy.

\- Your luck is that I like you. - Turned out to laugh at the situation.

That was the moment when, the eldest watching the scene from outside, wondered internally thoughts of the boy who he was teaching.

He had read in his diary that he wouldn't approach anyone. He wanted to be alone, someone different. So what was he doing next to Jackson Wang as he had known the boy for years? How long they knew each other?

Little was able to focus when the bell rang and he noted that he hadn't given the necessary papers to the father of the boy yet, who had turned his first enemy of the year after the Thai, of course.

\- Man, I need to go to the classroom and I think you too. - The blonde said, leaving the friend with that look of someone who clearly didn't want to go.

\- I know... Well, see you later, okay? - Both nodded and headed to different sides, while Junior was the one who stood there, digesting all the situation that his eyes were able to see.

He sighed knowing that he also had to make their way back, even though his head hadn't returned to its rightful place yet.

A long day, it'd be a long day...

 

**xxx**

At the class, Junior was still adding his subject to his students, never missing an opportunity to keep an eye on the boy who sat at the back of the room, always quiet and considerate of his diary, also taking the opportunity to make him more curious about what else the boy had in that journal.

Perhaps he was never going to have that same opportunity, to pick up the object in hand and read it quietly in the armchair of his house.

The boy despised him so much that he couldn't stem the tide of anger that seemed to take possession of his body.

\- Bambam. - The class watched, still intrigued by the fact that the teacher called the boy for a strange name one hour to another, no fights, no disagreements, even small ones. They insisted on the theory their teacher was abducted. - Talk about Linear Dilatation.

\- Applies only to the bodies in the solid state, and is the considerable variation of only one dimension. - He sighed, taking Junior to have the obvious thought as always: How? It was flawless. - A good example are bars, cables and wires.

\- Right... Care to come here and draw in a scheme to better understanding of the theme? A simple table along the final formula. - Okay... What was that? The teacher wanted something? He stroked his forehead, sighing before standing hesitantly.

Bambam didn't like some people admiring him, or whatever it was. Perhaps because it shamed him easily or made a lot of pressure on him. And Junior could see the first fault of the boy, starting with redness on his face while he fixed his gaze on the board and his fingers trembled.

"Bingo!"

That was exactly what he needed.

\- Done. - He was ready to turn his back before being called back by the person who was standing beside him.

\- Not yet, I wish you could explain in your own words the scheme and associated things, shall we? - Jinyoung smiled victorious when the eyes of the redhead seemed to beg him to change his mind.

\- Well... - The boy didn't know how to start. Everyone there looked at him expecting something, hoping he would take forward and speak as he always have, but it was easier when he was in his place. There he could lower his head and pretend it never existed. In front of everyone else, he couldn't.

He needed to take more breath, remembering why he hated the teacher who now watched him with an almost sadistic smile. His hands were behind his body, smoothing into each other, trying to reduce the sweat that they gave off.

It attracted Mark, who looked quickly at Youngjae. That wasn't the same boy who spoke of the back row. What clearly was the perfect reason why both were looking for the Thai, as they couldn't observe him all alone and quiet.

They knew, of course, that his teacher started to spend a lot of time with Bambam, but judging by the hostile behavior of both, nothing had really changed. Only a peace treaty extended over a very thin line.

That kind of thing haven't passed unnoticed by the American's eyes, who was really thoughtful and considerate, always stopping to analyze situations and points he thought was very important.

Youngjae wasn't far behind, but the boy was engaged more in making comments and things that Mark took as "brilliant and creative" since the boy was very intelligent and had ideas that he would never have time to think.

That's what raised the dynamism of both.

Meanwhile, Bambam tried without much success to speak without stuttering, occasionally nibbling at his bottom lip, looking at a fixed point to lean on and feels like he wasn't seeing anyone, explaining what he had learned and done in the scheme.

His stomach seemed to put out all the lunch that he had the trouble to eat, that didn't go unnoticed by Junior's gaze, who was finally beginning to feel his disordered consciousness regret.

\- All right, I think your colleagues understood, isn't it? - The students nodded before looking at each other.

Kunpimook spared a look accomplice to all eyes and a disapprovingly one to his teacher before sitting down.

The brunette felt it burn as he slapped himself internally, without knowing exactly why he was so angry and tortured the boy.

If that was his way of trying to approach Bambam, wouldn't work at all.

**xxx**

Mark couldn't fail to fulfill what he had in mind from the day before. It was that way he stepped on the school next to Youngjae.

Both lived nearby and had spent almost the whole day in each other's houses, commenting on how they should approach the new student, which would be better to say, what would they do if the boy rejected them, even though deep down, they felt like they didn't need to worry about that kind of reaction.

They have ended up analyzing students there at the entrance, through the eyes thoroughly trying to find the familiar face of their classroom, without much success. Some third years intermingled with the second, but most were lovers.

The third year's fame was that they didn't engage with the second without a good reason. And the most part were bets, what made people get suspicious at the others. No one wanted their feelings to be thrown into the mud.

Few cases were saved, but most were made of what no one wanted.

Mark even remembered one of them coming to talk to him, but the situation was so strange that besides the lack of reaction, he only even took the time to remember of what they were capable of. Especially when the boy was beautiful and popular for some good reason.

\- Where the hell did he hide? - Youngjae asked, still not having given up on finding the boy in the crowd. - Now that we decided to talk, he decides to disappear!

\- But if you see, he always appears near the class schedule, we've never seen he entering from the school's gates. - Mark said, leaving a thoughtful Youngjae.

\- This is true. He never goes out with us when it's time to go home. At least, not that I've seen him go through the gate one day. - Where did the boy live?

That was the last thing he could ask before hearing the signal echoing for the whole school, not tarrying to follow his friend toward their class, just staring at the face of his teacher who seemed to search for the same face in the door, stopping only to say a short good day for each student that passed by him.

Unfortunately none of them had contact with the boy, since he didn't attend the lessons of the first period, generating a lot of questions to the one who was now trying to teach without thinking of the other boy.

\- Does anyone know anything about Bambam? - The eyes were the same and that was the third time he wondered the same thing. He nodded before returning to the content on the board.

He didn't want to let the boy angry and knew that Bambam was prone to making rash things, even though they coexisted not for too long. And rash things weren't good, since he was quite sure he would miss that face sitting in the back of his classroom, writing and babbling well-aimed answers without losing focus.

At the worst, he couldn't help thinking that something bad could've happened and the other needed someone's help.

Junior had given up thinking when the boy from his thoughts sprang to the door, asking permission politely. His face was slightly swollen and his eyes weren't in the best condition, which attracted a bit of attention.

\- The director asked for me to give you this warning of absence in the first period. - Junior took carefully the paper. - Excuse me, I'm gonna sit.

And so he returned to his seat, wincing there with his head down. The paper said that the absence was caused by a cold, but in the end he felt it was a lie. And as at other times, he couldn't read him. He wanted to read the boy, but he couldn't, and that was angering him deeply.

Concerns were real. And they sought that boy's face that didn't want to say anything, but that said it all. He wanted to get him out, hug him and say that everything would be fine, even if it left the boy even more away.

It was what his mind screamed to be the right thing, but at the same time, something told to avoid because it, besides strange, could be taken as favoritism, which in fact would be misinterpreted by students.

Now he saw how his life was difficult, since he had taken a different point of view.

That point of view he was no longer a stone at the things around him, but that didn't stop him from feeling an extremely absurd fear of everything taking a course he had never seen in his life and the fact that things begin to go wrong.

He was still digesting the fact that everything was caused by a person. Only one in a few months.

The signal was the simple impediment that this internal discussion should continue at another time, letting his eyes float in the boy's silhouette who was now going out the classroom, attempting to hide his face somehow.

\- Come, let's go after him. - Heard Mark comment with Youngjae before leaving the room.

That was the only thing that prevented him to get up and go after the boy.

 

**xxx**

 

\- Hey! - It was the moment when Youngjae called the Thai, hoping he'd turn to look at them, which didn't take long, the boy showing surprise.

\- Hey...  - The other wasn't sure how to react, since he didn't expect it at all.

\- We know you're not much of talking and we always see you run away and disappear. Mark thinks it isn't cool you be alone, because he's also a foreigner and he knows that's bad.

Youngjae trailed the tips of his foot on the asphalt, gaining the attention of both who nodded.

\- So we thought it would be, you know... Cool call you to come talk to us?

\- Be our friend, actually. - Mark pointed out, getting a different look, still surprised. - I know you're almost a fugitive, but no harm in trying.

Bambam stopped and thought for a few minutes, staring at the faces of two young people.

\- I may not be the best person to have friends. - He shrugged, somewhat uncertain. The voice was still hoarse, attracting even more attention from the older boy of the three. - But...

\- But...? - Youngjae encouraged him.

\- It wouldn't be bad if at least I try, isn't it?

A half-smile played out, which actually encouraged the other two, with a brief celebration of both. Bambam could already see Jackson's eyes light up when this news, after all, was for him that he was doing that, however reluctant he was.

\- We're happy! So... Bambam? - The other nodded, raising curiosity. - I was already thinking of what name we would give you to not call you Kunpimook.

\- It's easier, so you don't have to torture yourself. You're Mark and Youngjae, right? - Both nodded as Mark turned his neck around, looking for the place where they used to sit.

\- Well, now that we are resolved, this is  the invitation for you to sit on the break with us always, okay? - Bambam smiled, accepting the request genuinely, following both to the location.

What he hadn't seen was Junior, who now was watching the conversation, frowning in disapproval. Why only he couldn't approach the younger?

His anger was so much that he wanted to grab Bambam's neck and shake until he decided to answer his questions and let him into his life.

"What the hell!"

He cursed in his mind, not feeling even his foot on the ground anymore when he turned around to return to the classroom and try to fix the activity sheets that were in his bag for a few days, as always, without success.

It was like a face in his mind, one who was decorated by rage and a ridiculous compassion.

What that boy had done with his life?

Unfortunately, he didn't know how to answer the question yet.

 


	5. 5. I Don't Hate You

Bambam no longer knew what part of his thoughts he should follow, since what he had planned for months had gone effortlessly into space.

The truth was that he didn't know if he was upset or happy to finally have people he could communicate, considering the fact that Yugyeom now was someone missing - at least until that due time - in his life. As much as in the bottom of his heart he still felt alone for various reasons, it was nice to have real and not imaginary people to communicate.

Basically, he felt like he betrayed the whole protocol.

Yugyeom had been his friend to everything since he moved to Thailand. The strange Korean. They were practically neighbors and friendliness got out almost immediately, considering the age was equaled.

When Kunpimook noticed, they already talked even if in a sloppy way both languages, making it less confusing. To the others it was still complicated, but within their world, no.

And then suddenly he noticed that he wasn't Kunpimook but Bambam, nickname he needed exactly two weeks of insistence to know what it meant.

_"Because whenever I see you everything for me does 'Bambam'"._

That phrase was still screaming in his mind, and maybe that had been a "love" part of his teenage years, bearing in mind the mutual feeling, leaving him laughing about the subject a few days later.

It was short-lived, since Yugyeom's brother returned from Korea to live with his family.

Unfortunately, Bambam had changed from the younger brother to the elder in a matter of feelings, regretting it later for reasons that were now more than obvious in his head.

A few days after his confession, he received the infamous news that he would be leaving for Korea to stay at his aunt's house along to his uncle and cousin. The latter, by the way, had won continuous presence in his life: Jackson.

He didn't know yet say whether fortunately or unfortunately.

Just didn't know how that boy could be his cousin. His family was fully formed by Thais, how did a Chinese appeared in half of everything?

And that was how he found that he would have to live at school, soon learned that the boy was the son of the caretaker.

_"I can't believe I have to share my room with this... Weirdo"._

Still clearly remembered Jackson's voice, knowing how to imitate him perfectly. That memory was joining others such as the initial complications that had the simple task of dividing the room, since their personalities and tastes were completely differents.

The Thai wanted to be someone reserved, while the Chinese tried to approach the "weirdo strange" that was - according to him - invading his favorite part of the bunk. Days later Bambam discovered that Jackson was afraid of heights and hated the top bunk, only just didn't want to agree with the situation.

Bambam didn't like light on to sleep, since he felt more comfortable in the dark. But Jackson couldn't sleep without the light - discovering later that it was by his fear of the dark - which made them buy a lamp to satisfy both needs.

But at the end, he ended up giving in, precisely because he couldn't handle the other's insistence, admitting that the boy would be a good friend.

After all, they were better as friends than as enemies.

And he really was during the days of his stay, supporting him according to the events.

Jackson was his second shoulder friend. Second because there was Yugyeom and he wasn't prepared to replace it. He wasn't prepared to leave behind things that he knew perfectly well that wouldn't be able to leave, in fact.

That's exactly why everything he had planned fell through. The Wang could soften part of his pre-set tough spirit.

Then he had Mark and Youngjae, which to misfortune had proved to be cool and loyal people at the first conversation, clearly wishing otherwise without obtaining complete success, of course.

This made him almost start to give up with his plan to be rude to almost every human being who passed through his life - plan that consisted of perhaps not be so rude to the guys he had known till that time, at least.

That's exactly why Bambam accepted to go out with both in the weekend, taking the opportunity to drag his cousin to the amusement park, a place that was decided from the start.

— Where can we meet? – The redhead thought for a moment before Mark took the lead. – If you prefer, we can pick you up at home!

— Well, do you live close to the school? – Youngjae frowned at the question, staring at the other friend who stared back.  – I live with the caretaker. He's my uncle.

It made perfect sense now in their heads. Bambam quickly arrived on time, quickly disappeared and never went out with all students.

— So you live with the Wangs? – He nodded, finding that really everyone knew Ricky. – That's strange... – Youngjae laughed. – But we can come up here to pick you up. We live pretty close.

So it was arranged, and the day took his own way, taking Jackson away from his comfort when he heard the shrill sound of the bell that led to the back door. Just didn't expect the surprise he would have to open the door and run into the beautiful face of Mark.

— Hi! You're Jackson, isn't it?

The blonde nodded a little static before closing the door on the two boys who were standing there, who quickly looked at each other wondering the bizarre behavior. Jackson continued to stare at the door before running into the room screaming Bambam's name in clear and apparent despair.

— What is it, creature? – The shock was the reaction he could sketch, stopping what he was doing to try to respond to other's despair. Or maybe the boy would die soon after.

— Mark... He's at the door... Why didn't you tell me that he would come here? – His hands were more than restless, bypassing the redhead's shoulders, almost shaking him.

— But I told you I would go out this weekend and they would come get us! – This time who was surprised was the Thai. – I don't believe you forgot... Jackson, did you tell them to come in? – The denial made the boy sigh almost angry.

— It's not my fault. What do I do? I'm horrible, I am–

— Stop. Freaking. Out! – He tried to keep the situation under control. – You get dressed up as I talk to them.

It was the last thing he said before running to the door and meet the current visitors, accommodating them on the couch.

—  Forgive us, Jackson is a little strange when he wants to... – He made a weird face to the boys, eliciting laughter from the other two - I'm going just get finished dressing up and I'll bring the weirdo with me.

— No problem. – The American announced. – Take your time, we arrived early.

Bambam could only nod before turning around and take way back to what he was doing before, taking the opportunity to help the Chinese and leave soon.

Luckily, they didn't take a lot of time to go out and take their way to the central amusement park, talking animatedly, everyone taking advantage to know each other better.

Mark sometimes watched carefully the Chinese's face there in the middle, finding his features kinda familiar, but unfortunately couldn't turn his face to someone who had ever seen, which made him a little interested in that person; Not that it mattered, really.

He decided it was better to forget it before realizing they were on the place.

— Youngjae, come with me to buy the tickets?

The boy nodded, looking at the rest of the guys, who nodded positively, giving money in their hands, just watching both turn away toward the cabins.

— Do you think he hates me? – Jackson asked, noting Bambam roll his eyes.

— He doesn't remember you! – He answered, getting a look at the boy who suffered.

— You mean he doesn't remember me?

— No, sir obvious, since that day he thinks of your face every day. – He rolled his eyes. – Of course he doesn't.

The redhead shrugged glancing through the crowd, avoiding the pity he would have watching his friend's face.

— I don't know if it's good or...

— He doesn't hate you or you being insignificant in his life?

Jackson opened his mouth a few times, not knowing how to answer the petulance of the younger boy.

— I hate you.

— You love me. – Bambam laughed before sharpen his vision at a familiar face in the crowd: Junior. – Oh no!

— Oh, not at all, even though–

— It's not it, Jackson!

— It's not what?

— Junior! Park Jinyoung! - Desperation was latent in his voice.

 ––Your teacher?  – What about him?

The Chinese now stared at the boy's face, trying to understand his line of reasoning.

–– He's here, he will come here... I don't know, pretend you're talking to me, hide me. I don't know!  – The youngest looked so distressed that he was only gesturing with his hands.

–– My God, all right! – Jackson repositioned the other in front to his face. – Damn, he keeps coming here, what do I do?

–– I don't know, did he see me? Do something, say something! – His hands clung in boy''s arms. - For God's sake, anything...

––You look like a potato mixed with a gasoline doll 'cuz you're so desperate.

For a moment the tallest stared at the face of the other boy before burst into laughs, almost threwing himself in his arms, little knowing that he definitely had now attracted the attention of his teacher who frowned when he noticed the silhouette and voice tone that you were extremely familiar. The closer he got, the more he was sure to confirm the situation.

Bambam was laughing. Laughing next to the janitor's son. Laughing while letting the other touch him. Touching him as well.

Jinyoung didn't know what was that feeling, but it was what made him decide to go straight, pretending that he didn't see any of the two boys.

–– Is he gone? – The Thai asked sniffling and wiping the tears that had formed in the corner of his eyes.

–– Apparently yes, I lost him in the crowd while I distract you laughing. He should have gone. – The smaller of the two said, passing his arm around the other's shoulder in order to support his friend.

–– Thanks, you saved my skin. – The boy now sighed, taking the opportunity to make sure that Junior had gone, just in case.

–– Do you hate him that much? – That's what made him stop for a moment, seriously considering the question that had been made.

Bambam didn't hate him, and that was one of his greatest certainties. Even because he had already passed by that childish stage that almost every teenager had. And he was also devoting himself to hate other people instead of directing this feeling to his teacher.

What happened was that Junior aroused his curiosity in some aspects, encompassing the fact that the older boy was very interested in his personal life and following him with the annoying way to try to offer shoulder and his friendship, when he didn't need - at least in his mind - that.

And judging by the insistence, he knew that Jinyoung didn't really get a 'no' in his life, which explained things well.

That irritated him because his teacher put him in the pattern of every student. Equal. And that was exactly what he wasn't and didn't want to be.

–– Maybe... – He breathed before notifying the friend that both boys were coming back with the tickets, heading towards them and following their way into the park.

But now, Jinyoung followed them, keeping his eyes directly on the redheaded boy, giving a mental excuse that he was just trying to have fun and wasn't following anyone. Even though he knew it was a lie; It was like trying to fool himself without knowing exactly why he was doing that.

Sometimes he saw Jackson with his arms around the Thai's shoulders, playing with the boy. That boiled his blood, although he didn't know exactly why. He wondered why it the Wang boy and not him, the frequency of that question was what irritated him the most, in his point of view.

The crowd was his hiding place, running away several times from the vision of the boys who were a little ahead. He didn't want to be seen, or things would seem too strange. Even if they were too excited to know which toy visit first.

Mark suggested the roller coaster, getting a big protest from Jackson. Youngjae wanted the Ferris wheel, but decided that would be the last toy, so that they could admire the sun set which everyone always said to be very beautiful.

–– We can go in bumper-cart and... I don't know... Horror house? – Genuine looks were thrown towards Bambam, getting then an acceptance in chorus.

Thus they followed the way, they didn't wait too long in the line which, luckily, was short. Jinyoung was looking for a not very visible grid just to watch the fun of his students, finding gracious the smile of happiness that the redhead had there in the middle.

As it wasn't showed frequently, he had been delighted, wishing to have more opportunities of this kind. This kind of affection for a student was different, too complicated so he couldn't discuss in his head.

Bambam had given life in his own and could only take note of that when he began to be guided every day, even if they were full of anger or compassion with possibly his moods ranging from depression to the expressionless peaks.

He was now part of his constant thoughts, not knowing exactly since when. What he knew was that he wanted to be part of the boy's life, no matter what. And maybe that was why he hated the Wang's only son who seemed to have so much experience with the privacies that the redhead used to impose himself.

 

**xxx**

 

The Tuan was the first out of his cart, celebrating his victory for winning Jackson five times, laughing at the boy who was now sulking at his side, muttering that was just luck.

Youngjae unfortunately had to return home after a call from his parents, explaining that they had unannounced visits and it was better for him to return home and avoid misprints. Which, of course, resulted in the most embarrassing situation in life to Bambam that only now had noticed how the other two who were left with him got along well. So well to the point of the conversation they were having energetically flow and no one could penetrate that bubble.

Not that it was a bad thing, after all, he liked to see the happiness in Jackson's puppy eyes.

But that was when he began to notice that something was wrong. Something very wrong, by the way. He sensed something, taking in the feeling that he was being followed from the beginning. And by his peripheral vision, he could observe Junior's face which seemed quite concerned about hiding next to the popcorn stand.

He sighed, turning to the Chinese who now admired the other guy that was going to the plushies stand, gazing fondly to the bear plushies there.

–– Jackson, Junior is following us. – Commented expecting some reaction.

–– That's nice. – Now his hands ran frantically in his pockets.

–– Jackson, this is not good, pay attention! My teacher is being weird and following us all over the park! – Cursed almost immediately because once again didn't receive an answer. – Help me! – He signaled with his hand.

–– Bambam, I'll help you. Before that I need to give that teddy bear to the other little bear. – The redhead sighed incredulously. – Take it, buy a cotton candy for you until I come back.

And with that the shortest was on his way, leaving the other sighing and wondering what to do.

By far the teacher Park watched everything with a frown, following his gaze when Bambam began to move to the tent of sweet cotton. That made him bump into someone, apologizing, but losing the boy in the crowd.

Eventually he took the same route, stopping near there, wondering where the boy was.

–– Is funny be following me around? – His stomach froze, immediately putting his hand on his chest trying to soften the shock.

–– Jesus... How did you know? I mean... I wasn't following you. – Asked worried while the younger smiled mockingly.

–– Did you really underestimate me? Please. – He rolled his eyes. – Why were you following me?

–– I don't know... You seemed to be having fun and I thought I needed to be sure that none of my students would be hurt.

 _"A beautiful liar",_ thought Bambam.

–– Well, I thought we're not children, isn't it? We are teenagers, you can go now.

–– You want me to go or remain to save you in the middle of your two "friends"? – Junior raised his fingers to complete the quotation marks in the air.

–– I prefer to be a third wheel among them than with you. – Complained.

–– Do you hate me that much? – The question was sincere, which attracted the attention of the younger, having answered that question mentally earlier.

Both stopped there on the way, facing each other in silence, which only dissipated when the Thai sought to go behind his cotton candy, causing the elder to follow.

Maybe it was a mutual that feeling, and the redhead didn't complain or grumble when he came back to be followed. It couldn't be that bad. Or could it?

Within minutes, both boys came back and Mark smiled graciously stuck to a teddy bear, which certainly was given by Jackson, the latter seemed proud of himself. The redhead watched the scene with his cotton candy in hand, frustrated by the lack of attention of his friend who just at that moment seemed to notice the presence of another person with them.

The look directed was pure concern as the youngest of the three others just shrugged. Now there was no more to be done.

–– Teacher will be with us? – Mark watched the animated face of the brunette, occasionally stealing a splinter from the sweet that the Thai had in hands, the latter looked distinctly uncomfortable.

–– I ended up finding him in the tent and he ended up inviting me to accompany you.

The redhead returned an incredulous look to the finger that was now pointed at his face, almost losing control of his hands to the point of wanting to attack him until he wasn't breathing anymore. The American let his eyes fall from the Thai to face the teacher.

–– Got it. – In his insides, he laughed as the lie was stamped on their face. – We're going to the horror house. Teacher has a problem with that? - Jinyoung denied immediately.

–– I just need to go to the bathroom, right? – Jackson was fast enough to pass his arm around the redhead's shoulders that was in front of him. - Bambam, come with me, we'll return soon! – They didn't even have time to say something.

–– What the hell does he want? – The youngest questioned irritably.

–– Since when you met him?

 _"How could he be unaware?",_ Questioned the Thai, surely Jackson was in a another world, different from his or anyone else.

–– He's following us from the beginning! – Luckily they arrived in the bathroom, where he could throw a water on his face. – But you were so focused on picking up a bear for hyung I just talked to the wind. – The blonde came back with that same puppy eyes that was thrown in the trash.

–– You know I have no guilt.

–– It's fault of your deficit or your stupidity even. – He crossed his arms at his chest, rethinking when once again Jackson did that face. – Yeah, you're right, you don't have guilt. But you didn't help me anyway.

Meanwhile, Mark continued to observe closely the face of an uncomfortable Junior who seemed curious about something, but didn't have courage enough to start a dialogue.

–– Why did the teacher lie? – The American shook his head, laughing at the surprise feature of the other guy. – Do you really think we're fools?

–– Well... no... I just thought it wasn't so obvious.

–– You're a terrible liar.

–– I know... – He ended up scratching his head sheepishly. – I didn't want to feel so intrusive on your trip, after all, I'm still the guy who teaches.

–– For Bambam, you remain an outsider. – Junior seemed disappointed in a way. – You wanted to ask me something related to it, right?

–– In fact...

Junior cleared his throat, wondering if he should even ask what he had in mind, agreeing internally that he should rather trust his student.

–– I was afraid to ask for your help.

For that he didn't expect. Park Jinyoung, known dictator who boasted of his intelligence and learning, asking for help to a student of the second year?

–– Go ahead.

–– I know you're not friends for a long time, but somehow or some reason, he accepted your approach. – Said, pretending not to know the real reason. – No idea, but something always tells me that I should try to get closer to him and I don't know. It looks like he...

–– Hates you? – The teacher nodded. That word seemed prohibited. – I understand...

–– But he pushes me away. And I can never have a healthy conversation and I never really know what to do and what happens to things be like this.

Mark thought for a moment, carefully choosing whether or not to help him.

It was complicated by the fact of not knowing very well how to act in that situation. He had hardly known Bambam and get involved in that would have its risks. At the same time, he had been touched by the sincerity in words and voice of the elder, which made him unconsciously accept.

–– I can tell you that he doesn't hate you, from what I've been watching. I don't know what I can do for you, actually... But he can't discover that I'm helping you! – He warned, drawing immediate consent from the other.

Mark had stopped to think at that moment that the Thai wasn't what we showed. In fact, he noticed it since always. Even because he adopted that security in his life for personal reasons and it seemed to the best thing to do.

And, perhaps being someone who had already experienced that kind of situation in his own skin, he could approach him even better to find out more and have more information.

That's exactly what he discussed with his teacher before the other two returned from the bathroom. They ceased the subject, focusing on go to the horror house, which in general evaluation had been a bad idea.

They had separated by pure carelessness in a bifurcation where there was little light. So they were just in couples.

–– I don't know what I did so bad in my past to have to support you in almost everywhere. – Bambam muttered, trying to keep calm. He hated being scared.

–– It's not my fault. You're the one who got scared and took the wrong way. – Jinyoung sharpened his vision, trying to get a glimpse of the way.

–– But you came after me, something that you didn't have to!

–– Would you rather I leave you alone then? I can redo the way back!

–– I prefer. – Jinyoung snorted in response to this.

–– Great, stay there! But if something starts pulling your leg, don't come crying to me.

And he would remade the way back, if the redhead hadn't stumbled onto something, screamed and grabbed his arm with a strength he didn't know he had. The boy scared like this was the end of everything, including his anger.

–– I-I didn't say it seriously... It can be dangerous to go alone... – he asked meek, Junior almost melted, giving up instead of returning.

–– You should be scared more often.

–– If you say anything else, I'll change my mind.

–– You know I wouldn't. – And he knew it.

Bambam considered the situation was somewhat strange, since it wasn't what he had imagined when he gave the idea in the beginning of the tour. He hated the fact of those highly disfigured figures appear in front of him and take all his focus and care about his safety, which made him soon stumble and luckily, Junior had great reflexes.

–– Are you alright? – The boy who just cringed looked up, noticing the reason that he didn't fall. Too close. It was too close to the point of not even moving, just nodding.

It was a strange situation, since Junior still held him with the same strength as before. As if he didn't want to let him go.

But Jinyoung didn't know why either, but he thought the boy was fragile and more he held him as a toy about to break, as if it were nothing.

There, at that moment, he didn't understand the feeling of protection that seemed to swallow him, vaguely remembering that he had never felt like this before. That exaggerated protective feeling but had never embedded somewhere in his life.

–– I think you can let me go now... – The boy whispered, perhaps waking up the elder from his trance. So he let the Thai go, the latter cleared his throat.

–– You need to pay attention when you walk... You could have been hurt. – It was his turn to scratch his head, perhaps embarrassed.

Neither of them knew what to say. Perhaps the feeling of awkwardness had hit the spot, disappearing again when another animal with a mask ran, fulfilling his role of fright other people, making Bambam be scared and cower in a corner.

–– I don't care, I just want get out of here. – He whimpered.

Jinyoung breathed, swallowing his own fright as he took care of the boy who looked like a kind of scared cat. He should emphasize that he used to hate human contact, but for some reason he was attracted by Bambam's hands, holding on to one of them, which obviously attracted a confused look in his direction.

–– This may leave you feeling safe, I don't know... – The hand was warm and for some reason Bambam didn't want to reject it, so just accepted.

Nothing more was said.

**xxx**

 

–– You should see! He screamed more than a girl. – Mark told what he experienced full of laughter, while Jackson looked like a sulky child in his corner.

–– I've never knew how to deal with darkness and, worse, with Sadako! – This time everyone laughed except Jackson. - This is bullying.

–– Tell them to call APA.

–– That offends me! - Bambam returned to shrug.

He was glad no one had noticed how awkward was the climate had been between him and his teacher.

Junior didn't let his hand go until they left that horror show, which, perchance, caused a strange aura surrounding both. Maybe it was because they were embarrassed, wordless. But it was better to stay separate.

But, unfortunately, you don't always get what you want.

–– Can I go with Mark hyung? Why do you have to go with him? I can go with you if you want! – The redhead whimpered next to Jackson who now laughed at the situation. – Jackson, I don't want to go with him. You know why!

–– I know, but that's for you to learn to not make fun of me!

–– God, it was a joke! Why do you take it so seriously?

–– It hurt my pride.

–– What pride?

–– See? See?! You go with him and stop mumbling like a child. – Bambam sighed. Jackson would pay for it. – Now watch the line, we'll be in the booth behind you.

What could go so wrong? The two would be in the cabin of a giant wheel, alone, watching the sunset as two normal people would. Silently.

Mark didn't seem interested in going first, then they ended up occupying the first cabin. The Thai could only breathe when the toy began to rise again as Junior just stared. They were really in an awkward situation.

–– The sun is beautiful when it sets, isn't it? – He knew that his teacher would do that. He knew that his teacher would try to approach him in a way or another. That's why he didn't bother to answer. That was why things were wrong.

The smaller of the two still had his gaze on the horizon, trying to remember when was the last time he had laid his eyes on something as beautiful as that evening. At least the eldest was right: It was beautiful.

A short filme went through his head, remembering everything that had happened and what he had now that were mere memories. Things he could forget any minute and say that he never had the opportunity to live them. After all, he could no longer live them and not even feel them. He wanted to be sorry for that, but couldn't for some reason.

His face turned to Junior, soon the latter noticed the look over his silhouette, finally managing to read that look so enigmatic. It was guilt.

–– I don't hate you.

–– Wait, what? – The situation needed to be analyzed. He was doing it on impulse.

–– I don't hate you. I mean... Seriously. I don't hate you. – He took a break to breathe. - You annoy me often, but I think that's why... I'm afraid of you.

–– Afraid of me? – That was new.

–– Yes. You have a very different representation in my life, but isn't your fault, I guess. Perhaps your fault is just trying to be nosy and too bossy.

–– I still don't quite understand everything you're telling me...

–– I know not, I just... I wanted you to know that I don't have bad feelings for you. I just want to kill you sometimes, but it passes quickly.

–– Well... It's reciprocal.

This time Bambam laughed, covering his smile with his right hand. Junior felt like a winner again. He was smiling for him. Finally.

–– Will you still be annoying with me?

–– Maybe...

–– That was pretty vague.

–– I'm vague, I won't give you every information of my life all of sudden.

–– But you could.

–– But... Look, you're not helping! – The teacher laughed.

–– I'm sorry. – Somehow it was being enchanting. And he liked it.

None of them needed more words, his thoughts were full of different desires and doubts. Bambam begged for that beautiful sky be the beginning of a new era as Junior... Junior just wished that was the beginning of a student with a new behavior.


End file.
